Primarily the Truth as I Know It

by Norman Horowitz

I found myself in the Air Force at 19, and at 20 I was an electronics instructor teaching six hours a day, six days a week, playing golf, drinking beer, and chasing women. I was young and healthy, away from my parents, and enjoying almost everything.

There was hardly anything “military” in what I did. All I needed to do was show up in uniform and teach.

I discovered at that time that many of the 1,000 men who were married and lived off base with their wives were more intent on chasing the women who attended our school than I was. It was Peyton Place with everyone wearing blue uniforms.

There were no rules that I was aware of (or paid attention to) that precluded consensual sex with the women who were in the service. I even laughed at the time that oral sex was forbidden and I always wondered why. It was considered “an unnatural sex act.”

In my squadron office, there was a very pretty blonde-haired, blue-eyed, statuesque woman who was the service records clerk. Her name was Linda, and she was my friend, and most of the married men in my squadron were chasing her, including the Commanding Officer, his Adjutant, and the First Sergeant of my squadron.

I started dating Linda about six months after we first met, and we had a very pleasant intimate relationship for a couple of months.

We both knew the transient nature of our relationship. She once told me that, as the service records clerk, she decided who got assigned elsewhere, and if our relationship ended badly, I would end up in Alaska or some remote part of Turkey.

Every two weeks, I needed to report for pay to the Commanding Officer, the Adjutant, the First Sergeant, and of course Linda. I knew (as did everyone else) that all three men were trying to have sex with her and all three were married. It was very funny, as the three men — who knew I was dating Linda — would ask me about the details of my sex life every time I reported for pay.

Almost all of the men, married or not, were trying to have sex with all of these women as often as possible.

That brings me to General Petraeus.

I look upon monogamy as an agreement between two adults not to engage in extramarital sex. Just why in Heaven’s name should it be an issue for everyone else — or anyone else for that matter?

Extramarital sex has nothing to do with society in general, but rather only with the family involved.

General Petraeus has ended his career, and I continue to wonder why.

I wonder how many members of the House or Senate are now or have ever been monogamous.

At Times I Wonder

by Norman Horowitz

Growing up in the thirties, my family lived in an apartment building in the Kingsbridge Road section in the Bronx.

Playing baseball in the streets was not possible for a variety of reasons, so we played a street game that I loved: “stickball.” There were a variety of forms to the game, but you always needed a ball called a “Spaldeen” and a stick, usually borrowed from my mother’s carpet sweeper. This all worked out well…except that the police would sneak up on our game and confiscate our sticks. We would post lookouts to guard against police intervention, and when a cop was spotted, the warning cry was: “Chickey, the cops!”

I always wondered about this, and still think about it today: Why did the cops do this?

In light of the Petraeus “scandal,” I have to ask the same question about “the morality police” who judge what sexual behavior is acceptable.

And now a small joke to make a point. [Stop reading if you’re offended by foul language.]

Those who have died throughout the world the previous day are lined up outside the pearly gates to be interviewed by St. Peter, who will determine if they will be assigned to Heaven or Hell.

As the teeming throng waits, a roar passes through the line. The people are joyous!

Someone asks what has happened and one man replies, “Thank God, thank God, fucking doesn’t count.”

Just exactly who makes these rules concerning sex?

I admit, men who are sexually aroused have a tendency to do the stupidest things. However, in my experience, sexual transgressions have nothing at all to do with the effectiveness of a person’s work.

In my opinion, we suffer from a collective societal craziness that accepts going to war for questionable reasons in Iraq, killing and wounding so many, yet questions the appropriateness of a grown man having consensual sex with a woman not his wife while married to someone else.

We appear to have forgiven Clinton, bring back and forgive Petraeus!